Meet Our Asteroid Prophets
Our team of experts has assembled a group of highly trained individuals who have dedicated their lives to predicting the end times.
According to our team of highly trained asteroid experts (i.e., Dave in Accounting), the asteroid is going to hit us all by next Thursday.
Size: 100 km diameter
Speed: 200 km/s (we're not exactly sure, but it's fast)
Impact Zone: The Entire Planet (it's not like we can avoid it)
See asteroid impact simulation
Robert the Uncertain
John the Inefficient
Mary the Ominous